Posted by: Marie | October 11, 2013

(872) Fire, acne and ghosts

Post #872
[Private journal entry written on Wednesday, June 20, 2012]

I heard on the radio that the High Park fire is 55% contained . . . today is the twelfth day of the fire . . . it has spread so wide . . . this fire has really been a monster . . . it has consumed more than 200 homes.

I hope it gets contained soon . . .

We are due for some cooler temperatures over the next few days, which will help with the firefighting efforts. And, a bunch of people are gathering in one of the city parks in City #1 to do a rain dance . . . everyone is bringing their rain sticks . . .

I’ve never seen a rain dance or a rain stick . . . I’m not sure what that’s all about . . . but it sounds interesting . . . at least fun! I’m not willing to make the drive over to see it, but I’m wishing it were feasible for me to come over and see it . . . I’m curious!

————–

During the conscious business network meeting this morning, I became aware that I was holding my body tensely. So, I made a point of relaxing my legs and letting them fall open . . . then, I untucked my feet from under the chair and put them more out in front of me . . . and I relaxed back into my chair . . . not quite into a slump, but not in a tensely upright position as I had been, either . . . somewhere in between.

That position doesn’t feel ladylike to me . . . but, it is sure more comfortable . . . I wonder if people perceive me as unladylike and slumpy when I sit like that . . . and would it create a problem for me if they did?

Hmmmmm . . .

————–

I’ve discovered that, when I wear make-up, my acne scabs get dry and they harden . . . and that makes them more tempting to pick . . .

(216)

Photo by Martin Chen

I’ve been using Proactive lately, and if I don’t wear make-up and don’t pick at the scabs . . . well, my face would heal faster. So, I’ve not been wearing make-up; therefore, my skin is healing nicely. So, I think I won’t wear make-up for a while and let my face heal even more.

However, that means I have to face the world without being able to hide my acne with make-up (to the extent I’m able) . . . and I worry that people will think less of me for having acne (or at least for not caring enough about what people think to take steps to cover it up) . . .

Guess what . . . ?? No one seems to care.

I was scheduled to interview a potential client this week and, prior to their scheduled arrival time, I debated about putting on make-up . . . you know, first impressions and all . . . I decided to put it on . . . and then, they didn’t even show up . . . and that ticked me off because I knew that putting on the make-up was going to create a picking temptation for me . . . and I did it for naught . . . oh, well.

However, I didn’t wear make-up at today’s conscious business networking meeting . . . I worried that some really cute guy would be at the meeting and his first impression of me would be my acne . . . but, no cute guys showed up, so it was a moot worry, LOL.

The lesson I’m learning through all of this is that people like me whether my acne is covered up or not . . . I’m noticing that they aren’t looking at any part of my face except my eyes . . . and they are treating me the same as always . . .

So, there you go . . .

————–

I’ve been playing with the idea of trying to communicate with my dad . . . as you know, he’s dead, so that would be a challenging feat . . .

Last night, I decided to set my digital recorder on “voice activated” status and put it on my nightstand overnight . . . paranormal experts believe that spirits can leave messages that way . . . I figured it wouldn’t hurt anything to try . . .

As I set up the recorder, I mentally invited my dad to leave a message . . . or any other spirits who would like to speak on his behalf . . . and I put the restriction up that only well-intentioned entities could participate . . . ill-intentioned entities were not welcome in my living space.

This morning, I checked it . . . there was only one recording, and it was me hollering at my cat to stop digging at the tiles in the dropped ceiling (he keeps trying to dig through the tiles and push them up so he can climb into the ceiling space and escape into the rest of the house).

I think I’m going to set up the recorder again tonight . . . it’s worth a shot . . .

What caused me to start thinking about trying to communicate with my dad is that a lady has started attending the conscious networking group who is a physical medium/psychic. She is more interested in teaching people how to connect with their loved ones who have “passed over” using their own intuition than she is in doing readings on their behalf.

I don’t know if she would be willing to do a reading with me . . . she may insist on only teaching me how to use my own intuition to communicate with my dad . . . which I feel I already do well with . . . I’m looking more for someone to validate what I’m feeling . . . an external source of information to confirm that I’m not just making stuff up in my head when I think I’m receiving information.

The digital recorder would do the same thing, assuming I actually get something on it . . . the recorder is a more passive approach while a psychic medium would be more aggressive . . . and I’m not sure I’m ready to be that aggressive with my search for validation . . . maybe I’ll just stick with the recorder for now.

Quotes 782


Responses

  1. I’ll be interested to hear if you hear from your dad (however it happens).

    • I can tell you that I do get to make a strong connection with my dad down the road a bit . . .

  2. If your skin is drying out from makeup, it’s time to switch brands. You should be able to choose makeup when you want, and not have it cause dryness. I’ve had good luck with Prescriptives moisturizer (the pink tub) and Origins concealer, FWIW.

    • Okay, reading a little more… Proactiv is really drying and I think it’s more well-formulated for teenager skin. Have you ever tried mixing your own toner with an antibiotic capsule? Talk to your doc. It can really curb the breakouts gently, without excessive drying. Non-soap cleanser. You also have to moisturize inside and out at your altitude! :) again, that Prescriptives stuff in the pink tub is amazing.
      I know I’m probably sounding nutty, commenting so much on skin care. It’s important, though! This self care component is huge in healing!

      • Hi, CW –

        Thanks for all the great info . . . it sounds like you have done your homework! Yes, skin care is an important part of healing . . . it’s part of learning to take care of myself . . . and treating myself with tenderness . . .

        I’ll have to look into your suggestions!

        – Marie


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