Posted by: Marie | March 1, 2009

(22) My spiritual journey – Part 9 of 9

Post #22
[Therapy homework assignment completed on Tuesday, April 8, 2008 – continued from previous post]


I don’t know how all of this works, I can only tell you what I experience.  When I absorb “input” from my normal senses and my paranormal senses, I put it all together and experience the resulting “output” in one of two ways: visual impressions or emotional impressions.

The visual impressions can be independent or can be superimposed on what I am seeing real-time with my physical eyes.  For example, future events usually show up as a collection of colorful geometrical shapes against a blank canvas – different shapes/colors indicate different things.

However, when I am reading the energy of a person with whom I am having a conversation, I take the image I see with my physical eyes and merge it, inside my head, with the geometrical shapes (the shapes are superimposed on the person’s image).

The emotional impressions can be based upon my own reaction to something or they can be sympathetic with other people’s emotions.  For example, when someone explains a spiritual/religious concept to me, it might “feel” truthful/accurate, deceptive/manipulative, or somewhere in between – I experience that as peace, fear, distrust, joy, etc.

On the other hand, when I attend a funeral, even if I don’t know the deceased and/or the family well, I am so overwhelmed by my sympathetic experience of the attendees’ emotions that I sob uncontrollably – I am not able to stay in the main room, I have to hang out in the bathroom or outdoors.  I experience the entire collection of everyone’s emotions, all at once, and it is too much for me to handle.

Some sensitives experience the “output” in sound, or smell, or physical sensations (but I don’t) – we all have our own way of experiencing the output.


When I read a person’s current intention (what he is intending to do in the present moment), I look at three things:

1) The focus of his physical being (where his eyes are looking, how his body is turned, etc.)

2) The focus of his mental being (the main subject of his thoughts)

3) His currently prevailing emotion (kindness, anger, etc.)

This is where it gets sticky – it is hard for me to explain how I can see the focus of someone’s mental being – I can’t hear individual thoughts, but I can sense his main mental focus – I’m not sure how I do that, but I experience it as if he has two antennas inside his skull and I can “see” what direction they are pointing.  (I have to laugh because that sounds so weird!  It is like explaining music to someone who can’t hear.)

Let me give you an example – during one of our first sessions, you gazed steadily at my shoes for a few seconds – in fact, you did that twice, about a minute apart.  I could see that your physical eyes were focused on my shoes.  I could sense that your “emotion” was inquisitive, observational.  However, I could sense that your mental focus was not on my shoes, it was on my overall body language.

If your physical focus and your mental focus were both centered on my shoes, I might have concluded that I had something (toilet paper?) on my shoe and that you were trying to figure out what it was – I would have looked at my shoes to see what was amiss.

However, your mental focus was on my overall body language, not my shoes.  That gave me the impression that you were testing to see how I would react to you staring at my shoes.  Now, I have no idea why you would want to know that, but that was the sense I got.  (I’m guessing you have no memory of this happening, but I remember it because I was very curious about what you were doing.)

Every time someone creates an intention, the intention embodies an emotion with a specific quality – more or less positive or negative.  Even after that intention passes, the positive-ness or the negative-ness of that emotion settles on the person’s heart as residual energy.  Over time, that residual energy gives the person’s heart a “color” – either positive or negative.

So, when I read the “color” of a person’s heart, I am looking at the positive-ness or the negative-ness that has collected on his heart over time – it indicates to me how positive or negative (loving/hateful, critical/supportive, etc.) the person is in general and the long-term intentions that person holds.  I believe that about 80% of the “input” I use to read a person’s heart comes from body language and about 20% from paranormal input.

When I “read” people, I normally take an observational stance – I allow the information to waft over to me like the smell of freshly brewed coffee.  If I want to gather information more quickly, I might “stick a finger” into their energy to get a feel for the different layers (like when I am on a first date or a job interview).

The “observational stance” would be like sitting on a lounge chair next to a swimming pool and smelling the chlorine and feeling the mist when someone dives into the pool.  My “sticking a finger into their energy” would be like sticking my foot into the pool – the information is experienced more acutely if I’m actually touching the water with a part of my body.

If I am desperately trying to collect information about someone’s intentions, I will “jump into the deep end” of the pool and gather information by having a full-body experience . . . and now, with that background, I’ll tell you the “rest of the story” pertaining to my experience with my boss, Jesse . . .

When he walked into the hotel room, I could tell from his body language that he fully intended to have sex with me and he had no intention of stopping, regardless of my wishes.  When he grabbed me and pushed me up against the wall, I “jumped into the deep end” of his energy.

Under normal circumstances, I don’t have the ability to do that, but when I fear for my life, I can – it has happened a few times in my lifetime.  It felt like about a third of my ethereal body exited my physical body through my chest and entered his body through his chest – the remaining 2/3 of my ethereal body stayed inside of me and the two parts stayed connected by a thick rope of energy.

When I was inside of him, I could look (and “touch”) his heart and I could look upward at his mind.  I could see, very clearly, that he was going to rape me and that he had the ability to kill me – it was very ugly in there.  I could see all of that very clearly – I don’t know how to explain it.  That is the part that really scared me – and the part I could never tell anyone because it sounds crazy.  I don’t know what “really” happens when I have that kind of experience, I only can tell you how I experience it.

And, that is why I was stunned when he suddenly let go of me, turned around and walked out of the room without a word – I don’t know what stopped him from doing what he came to do.


I believe we have a physical body and an ethereal body and they are very similar in shape.  Illness comes when they are out of alignment.  I am fairly certain that our ethereal bodies and our souls are either one and the same, or are at least intimately intertwined.

Personally, my ethereal body has been pulled out of my body (from below my neck) and has been crammed into my head due to life experiences, which is why I feel like a floating head.  Now, I am working to even out its distribution throughout my entire body.


  1. These are fascinating experience (though sometimes difficult and awful). I don’t have any equivalent experiences – which makes them even more interesting.

    • Hey, Evan –

      I appreciate your willingness to learn about stuff you don’t understand . . . I really appreciate your open-mindedness . . .

      – Marie

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