Category: self image

The following blog posts all touch on the topic of self image:

February 26, 2008
(Posted to the blog on 1/23/09)
What I see in the mirror: Homework assignment

May 11, 2008
(Posted to the blog on 3/22/09)
The loss of innocence: Disclosing too much too soon; Sadness; Healthy sexual fantasies

May 18, 2008
(Posted to the blog on 3/25/09)
Shutting down the emotions: Conflicts between “doing” and “being”

June 1, 2008 – Part 1
(Posted to the blog on 3/30/09)
The sexual pleasure I experienced: Still fearful about role-playing; Remembering the shameful pleasure

June 22, 2008
(Posted to the blog on 4/11/09)
This is a good place: Positive shifts in my thinking

August 2008
(Posted to the blog on 5/14/09)
Truth is not always absolute: I finally understand why I am so triggered by the conflict

October 28, 2008 – Part 3
(Posted to the blog on 6/8/09)
An end to therapy – Part 3: I have a theory as to why I am so addicted to violent porn — and the theory gives me great hope

January 11, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 6/18/09)
Reprogramming my arousal: I am not my history

April 4, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 8/9/09)
Being realistic or cynical?: My new beau leaves me high and dry

April 5, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 8/10/09)
With or without you: I give my therapist an ultimatum: Walk through the pain with me or I’m walking away from our therapy

May 28, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 8/31/09)
Taking stock of the damage: Book study – “Courage to Heal” – self-esteem and personal power

June 15-17, 2009 – Part 7
(Posted to the blog on 9/26/09)
Lasting effects – Part 7: Book study – “Courage to Heal” – self-worth

June 24, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 10/14/09)
It’s easier to forget: Book study – “Courage to Heal” – forgetting it happened, splitting into all good or all bad

June 25, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 10/15/09)
The opposing faces of me: Book study – “Courage to Heal” – lack of integration

June 26, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 10/16/09)
Putting names to the faces: Book study – “Courage to Heal” – dissociation

July 7, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 10/28/09)
Choosing numbness over pain: Book study – “Courage to Heal” – mental illness, self-injury, isolation, addictions

July 18, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 11/18/09)
It all makes sense: More memories surface; I’m starting to get my arms around my parents’ role in the trauma

July 19, 2009 – morning
(Posted to the blog on 11/20/09)
Showing my face around: I am starting to feel less shame about my history, and less need to hide it from people

August 20, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 1/1/10)
Jumbo tools of sex: My sexuality is broken and I’m disconnected from my gender

August 21, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 1/4/10)
Pain is a great teacher: Excerpts from a couple of “healing from trauma” books

September 18, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 1/15/10)
Male attention: Someone catches my interest

September 23, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 1/19/10)
Keeping it aboveboard: Can I behave myself with a married man?

September 24, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 1/20/10)
The million-dollar question: Why am I willing to participate in questionable relationships?

September 25, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 1/22/10)
And now I am here: Do people value me?

September 26, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 1/25/10)
The many faces of depression: There are benefits to depression

September 29, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 1/27/10)
Another step out of hiding: Teaching a class on blogging

October 12, 2009 (midday)
(Posted to the blog on 1/31/10)
A sense of badness: Can I contaminate my students just by being around them?

October 12, 2009 (9pm)
(Posted to the blog on 2/1/10)
Maybe the good outweighs the bad: Maybe there is good in my students witnessing my progressive healing

READER INPUT
(Posted to the blog on 2/3/10)
Reader Input – Getting heard: How do you make sure you are being heard?

October 23, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 2/8/10)
The meaning behind a touch: I avoid all touch with people because I fear they will think I’m coming on to them

GUEST POST
(Posted to the blog on 2/10/10)
Guest Post – PTSD (Power) Balance: Finding balance by feeding your joy

October 25, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 2/11/10)
Honest but selfish: I don’t fault my ex-husband for being honest

November 2, 2009 – 3am
(Posted to the blog on 2/12/10)
How innocent am I really? A memory about a time I may have acted out sexually as a child

SPOTLIGHT
(Posted to the blog on 2/17/10)
Spotlight – A Surprisingly Sane Blog: Spotlight on a great blog

November 4, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 2/18/10)
Repeat performances: How can I feel safe when I’m always fighting to protect my boundaries

November 6, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 2/19/10)
Five steps backward: Stuck in depression, not wanting to continue living

November 7, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 2/22/10)
Words from cooler heads: Posts from other blogs that look at suicide and perfectionism

READER INPUT
(Posted to the blog on 2/24/10)
Reader Input – Asking for apologies: When is it appropriate to ask someone to apologize?

November 15, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 2/26/10)
Stabbing pain: Remembering a gynecology appointment that left me feeling violated

November 17, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 3/1/10)
He has kind eyes: I want to be in touch with my femininity

November 21, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 3/4/10)
One tough cookie: What does it mean to be tough? Strong?

December 1, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 3/15/10)
Doing my part: Healing my beliefs about men requires daily choosing

December 2, 2009 (8pm)
(Posted to the blog on 3/18/10)
Comforting the scared ones: Speaking compassionately to the scared parts of me

READER INPUT
(Posted to the blog on 4/1/10)
Reader Input – Who are you? How do you go about learning the “real deal” about yourself or someone else?

December 17, 2009
(Posted to the blog on 4/9/10)
Anger towards God: Being brave enough to voice my feelings towards God

January 6, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 4/29/10)
Desperate cravings: Searching for a sense of self

GUEST POST
(Posted to the blog on 5/3/10)
Guest Post – The Guilt Sentinel: The painful coping mechanism of guilt

January 7, 2010 – 3pm – Part 2
(Posted to the blog on 5/5/10)
This day finally arrived – Part 2: An uncomfortable mirror exercise

January 7, 2010 – 3pm – Part 4
(Posted to the blog on 5/7/10)
This day finally arrived – Part 4: The session leaves me with mixed feelings and a bit of confusion

January 12, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 5/19/10)
A need to be believed: When I say that the pain is “that bad”, I want people to believe that I’m not exaggerating

January 13, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 5/20/10)
The pain of dealing with people: Everyday interaction with people can be difficult

January 17, 2010 – 8pm
(Posted to the blog on 5/24/10)
Please stop spinning: Feeling overwhelmed by flashbacks and triggering

January 18, 2010 – 2pm
(Posted to the blog on 5/28/10)
Attempts two, three and four: Desperately trying to repair the relationship with my therapist

January 18, 2010 – 11pm
(Posted to the blog on 5/31/10)
This must be the end: Maybe I’m capable of only attracting assholes

January 20, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 6/3/10)
Resigned to reality: The best I can hope for is to understand his postion

January 21, 2010 – Part 2
(Posted to the blog on 6/7/10)
Session deux – Part 2: Uncovering the reason why my therapist keeps violating the religion boundary

January 21, 2010 – Part 3
(Posted to the blog on 6/8/10)
Session deux – Part 3: Questioning what it means to dissociate

January 22, 2010 – Part 1
(Posted to the blog on 6/10/10)
Sorting through it all – Part 1: Is it a deal-breaker that my therapist doesn’t believe me?

January 22, 2010 – Part 2
(Posted to the blog on 6/11/10)
Sorting through it all – Part 2: Anger and apologies

January 24, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 6/16/10)
Bits and pieces: Dreams, piano lessons and emotional promiscuity

February 4, 2010 – Part 1
(Posted to the blog on 6/23/10)
Session trois – Part 1: Both Mark and I have tender spots in our psyches

February 5, 2010 – 5pm
(Posted to the blog on 7/5/10)
Melting down – 5pm: Maybe I’m beyond help

February 5, 2010 – 7pm
(Posted to the blog on 7/6/10)
Melting down – 7pm: What if I quit trying to talk to people who aren’t willing to listen?

February 5, 2010 – 9pm
(Posted to the blog on 7/7/10)
Melting down – 9pm: Most of all, I need to be heard

February 6, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 7/9/10)
The meltdown exposes gold: I feel a physical and spiritual shift in my body

February 7, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 7/12/10)
We speak the truth: What it means to hold my parents responsible

February 15, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 7/14/10)
Hopeful thinking: What if I set aside what I know to be true about men?

February 16, 2010 – Part 3
(Posted to the blog on 7/20/10)
Finding my voice – Part 3: I need my therapist to be a witness to what I need to say and do without making it about himself

February 16, 2010 – Part 4
(Posted to the blog on 7/21/10)
Finding my voice – Part 4: Most of all, I need to be heard

February 16, 2010 – Part 5
(Posted to the blog on 7/22/10)
Finding my voice – Part 5: All the reasons I keep trying to make it work with Mark

February 27, 2010 – Part 2
(Posted to the blog on 8/3/10)
Truth keeps flowing – Part 2: Asking for an apology

February 27, 2010 – Part 3
(Posted to the blog on 8/4/10)
Truth keeps flowing – Part 3: A pattern of selecting men who are not emotionally available

February 27, 2010 – Part 4
(Posted to the blog on 8/5/10)
Truth keeps flowing – Part 4: Complaints about my relationships

February 27, 2010 – Part 5
(Posted to the blog on 8/6/10)
Truth keeps flowing – Part 5: My family doesn’t support me

March 3, 2010
(Posted to the blog on 8/11/10)
Neurotic enabling: Trying to understand neurotic behavior inevitably fosters enabling

March 4, 2010 – noon – Part 1
(Posted to the blog on 8/12/10)
He leads the way – Part 1: The state of my relationships

March 4, 2010 – 1:30pm
(Posted to the blog on 8/18/10)
Beginning of the end – 1:30pm: Mark is a narcissistic, stubborn, prideful, lazy, arrogant son-of-a-bitch – and a really bad therapist

March 4, 2010 – 2:30pm
(Posted to the blog on 8/20/10)
Beginning of the end – 2:30pm: Starting the search for a new therapist

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